Sunday, April 12, 2009

Growing Beyond Limiting Beliefs

It is 7:30 am. Two hours before the next scheduled Akashic Reading, this time a new client, someone I have never met. The reading is a phone reading, and it has been a while since I've done one for someone I have never met.

8:30, still an hour to go and I'm nervous. "When will I get over being nervous before a reading?" I ask myself. "Take a shower and let the water relax you," I then think.

I start my conversation with spirit in the shower. They say, "Repeat after us, 'I am not responsible for anyone. I am not here to fix anyone because no one is broken. Each person will create their own reading experience, my job is just to be present and allow.'"

Okay, okay, I get that. On the verge of releasing my book to the public, my first novel, I am frequently anxious. I am stretching beyond a believed limit, one that I am not even fully aware of. "You are not growing beyond your capabilities, just beyond what you think you are capable of." That is what they said to me about the anxiety.

9:27, I am guided to place some crystals in a specific pattern in my healing room. This is not common, but not unusual either. "Hold on," I say to my new client in my head, "I need a couple of minutes longer to finish this."

9:33, I am done, but the phone has not rung. I look at my phone and it says, "No Line." What? What happened to my connection. I pick up the phone and I get a dial tone for a moment, then silence. I hang up and try again; this time all is well. "Ah, thank you spirit. You cut my line to buy me an extra couple of minutes." Sure enough, my client had tried to call, twice!

We open her records and the energy starts flying in. "This is a ceremony. This is a celebration." As it turns out, the crystals are significant to her.

Information starts flowing immediately. This is good and I become relaxed very quickly. Ah, this is nice.

At one point, in the middle of the reading, she asks a questions sort of off topic.

Suddenly I am as if in the middle of Times Square. There is energy all around me. I feel like I am getting 15 pieces of information back, all at once, yet I can't catch a hold of any one piece. I reach over here, then there, the words do not come.

"Wel... - Mayb... - I, ah, -" I can't even get a full word out of my mouth. The information is there, so there is no block. Hmm, what to do?...

I take a step back, out of the confusion. "Ok, let's try something else. Let's try and ask a different question. Actually, let me ask you a question. What do you like about {that}?"

As she begins to relate to me what she likes, (loves) about this particular subject, I get placed back into the energy of it, but now the fog has lifted and I experience absolute clarity. I am not only shown the relevance of the subject pertaining to her path, I am also shown what had just happened and why.

The Perfection of the Universe is a phrase I had been given years ago. It exists, always, in every moment. It is when two pieces of All That Is share an experience and each receives exactly what it created. Seeing the Perfection of the Universe is the challenge, the adventure.

In my nervousness, I was asking and wanting. In her questions, she was also. We each sought different information and we each created enough allowing to reach the answer. The Record Keepers were showing me how she controlled the reading. When she was confused, she place me inside of that confusion. She had a question and didn't know the answer, and it was a subject she felt very scattered about. That was exactly the experience I had when faced with the question.

However, in my allowing, I found the path from her confusion to her clarity. By talking about what she loved in that subject, we arrived. I guided her, but she took me there. I felt that. In a flash of understanding, I was shown how it all works, and I was being asked to share this with her.

Spirit wanted her to experience and to know that it was her power that brought the answers to her. I'm only the messenger, the translator. In fact, I would often just tell her something about my experiences, my life, my challenges only to find her saying, "You have just described my life. I now understand why I feel the way I do about this."

I asked spirit for their help for those things I feel anxious about, scared about, challenged by. I am willing, I am walking through the fear, yet I feel it. "You are not growing beyond your capabilities, just beyond what you think you are capable of."

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

How wonderful to know that we create our reality. The power is in our hands. The task is not beyond what we are capable of doing. When we seek clarity, the path out of the fog is revealed, yet we have to walk that path to reach the sunny pastures. There is no time pressure, there is no needing to do anything. You have all the time you need to walk from where you are to where you want to be. Spirit is here, like a loyal pet, at our side and forever in our service. To see this and feel this is such a gift.

The next day, playing on Twitter, I find someone who wrote something to the effect of, "'A silent, mild anxiety' makes me think something is wrong..." 'A silent, mild anxiety', what beautiful words to describe what I had been feeling. My anxiety was not so silent, but I got what he was conveying. Yet, amazingly, right beyond the anxiety is joy, incredible bliss. I feel it.

I am on the verge of realizing a dream I have had for much of my life. I am on the verge of being a published author and am sharing my art with the world. I am giving the world a piece of me that I have nurtured for a long time. The anxiety is just the doorway between this place and that one. I am firmly standing in the doorway, but I am sticking my head into the next room, and seeing beyond my limiting beliefs.

"Take a deep breath and walk through the door. The journey may not be easy, but it will take you to where you want to be."

"To consider the journey’s entirety before taking the first step is to see only the burden of the task. The joy and bliss can only be found when taking each step in the moment.” - from A Fool's Journey