A Message About Relationship

Last night was the completion of my four-part series called Creating Higher Vibration Relationships.  I would like to thank all of you that attended, both physically and vibrationally.

This work is not just self work.  As we reach for higher vibration relationships, we create a path to them.  We are cutting a path through the jungle, and others who seek the same, will stumble upon this path and know there are those that came before them.

As a part of the final session of the class, spirit gave me a message for those attending.  After reading it to everyone, I was asked to distribute the message.  As I began doing that this morning, I decided to post the message here on my blog so that anyone can stumble upon it.

At this moment, the planet is rotating into 11/11/2009 one time zone followed by the next.  This is the 11:11:11.  Will this gateway bring something noticeable?  Or will it shift us in ways unseen?

Time will tell all  -  wi11  te11  a11

Best wishes on your journey,
David



You CAN have everything you want in relationship just as you can have everything you want in life.
 
But only YOU can create your relationship experience.
 
You may be in a relationship with another, but you’re experience of them is solely your creation just as their experience of you is theirs.
 
The Universe gives freely and at no cost!  You are not in exchange with the Universe – you only think that you are.
 
All of the answers are within you and available to you.  You need only ask and listen.
 
The source within you and the source within another is the SAME SOURCE.  You cannot serve the source within yourself and not serve the source within the other.
 
As you seek to connect and commune with the source within yourself, you will attract to you those who will benefit from all that YOU desire.
 
There is no desire held on the planet that is held by only one person. There is no desire that cannot be answered.
 
You can create any form of relationship you desire, however once you move into manipulation and coercion in an attempt to gain it, you have laid down your power of creation.  You cannot create what you desire for very long by demanding it or requiring it, because your demands and requirements are a demonstration of your disbelief that all is given freely.  If you believe you have to pay for what you receive, so you shall experience that belief.
 
Madam Justice is a reminder to you that the laws of manifestation are exact.  You shall reap precisely that which you sow.  If these laws were not precise, you could not hope to know your true self for only in the experiencing of all that you create can you come to know that which is of your true self and that which is not.  And if you cannot come to know your true self, you cannot come to know me, for my true self lies within you.

October Readings

Last month, I mentioned to y’all that I have been working with Stephanie Golden-Falcon on a weekly basis.  Well, as a result of our work today, we’ve brought through two very similar readings, which serve as guidance from spirit for this current phase of development that is now upon us (and just ahead).

In this first reading, you will see five cards laid out in an octagonal shape.

The middle row illustrates an ideal path forward. 

Notice that in the center (of the wheel) we find The Emperor. The Emperor represents a man or woman who is centered (anchored) within their power.  The Archetypal Emperor becomes the powerful leader he is by commanding (owning) his power of self, not through a demonstration of power over others.

At present, The Emperor is positioned between The Devil (below) and The Tower (above).

As spirit shows, The Emperor, by being centered within his power, is able to ride above all physical entanglements (The Devil) and weather the storm (The Tower).

The Devil represents this physical realm, neither good nor bad in and of itself. Yet, it is the pleasure and pain of the physical realm that can gain power over us.  We become addicted to our sensory pleasures.  In fact, fear is equally as addicting, attracting our attention and immobilizing us like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming truck.

The Tower represents those events within the physical world that are jarring.  In an instant, a belief system, an ideal, an infrastructure, and even a physical building can collapse into ruin.  In nature, eggs crack open as part of birth in some species.  In other species, the skin rips open and is shed through molting.  In order to grow, old structures must be abandoned.  Even the hermit crab, which does not create its own shell, must abandon an old homes when it ceases to provide enough room for its growing body.

To me, The Tower represents abrupt discontinuity – a hard left.  It is time to change direction to stay on course.

Within your power, as your Emperor self, you rise above physical encumbrances and survive the collapse unscathed.

Looking behind The Emperor, we see The Chariot. The Chariot is not driven; it is ridden!  It is a one-person vehicle and we each have our own.  In fact, The Chariot looks very much like the Emperor’s throne, but with wheels! [Study a traditional Emperor and Chariot and notice how similar they are (although not in this deck per se).]  To successfully ride The Chariot, you first must be in your own chariot; then hold on.  The stallions of spirit drive these mighty carriages.  They are designed to move and fast!

And look where you are headed, straight into your own guiding light! The Star represents your Higher Self.  Each of us has our own Star just as we have our own Chariot.  There is only one Sun shining down for all of the Earth, but there are thousands and thousands stars.  To navigate our current stage of growth, we each need to follow our OWN Star.

In the second reading, notice that we have many of the same cards, yet also notice we have additional information.

Focus on the upper left corner.  Here we again see The Chariot and The Star, but this time, it is The Hermit that lies between them. The Hermit represents turning inward, tuning in, and listening to spirit.  The Star is behind The Hermit, out of his sight, yet shining light on his path ahead.  The Chariot lies in front of the Hermit directly in sight as if spirit is saying to him, “Board! We have been waiting for you.  Let us carry you to safety.”

The Star also represents ‘being’ while the Chariot represents ‘doing’.  Notice that Temperance is below The Hermit and between these two states.  Spirit is guiding us to split our time between being and doing.  There is a time to be and a time to do.  Our state of being prepares the path, and then we are called to walk it.  The time to do, to act, may be drawing nearer!

Now in this particular and unique layout, Temperance also lies in between The Hermit and The Devil.  The Devil is again about the Earth Realm while The Hermit is about tuning into the Spirit Realm.  We ARE spiritual beings, but we are also physical humans walking the Earth.  The Earth (within and without) needs to be attended to.  Our physical bodies need care: food, air, water and even touch!  We cannot live in this realm on spirit alone (at least not at this stage of evolution).

Now look at the upper right corner where The Wheel of Fortune jumps out at us.  Surrounding it are Justice, The Sun, and The Tower.  The Tower sits directly below and at the lowest point of the Wheel.  Radical discontinuity on the Earth Plane is harsh and disruptive.  Instantaneous disillusionment is just as jarring.  The Tower, while sometimes necessary, is not fun.

You cannot see this, but Madam Justice is holding scales in her left hand.  Lying on top of her scales is The Wheel of Fortune.  These scales represent the Law of Karma; we attract what we focus on and The Wheel of Fortune delivers it to us.  Justice is a constant reminder that it is our thoughts that turn the wheel.  Are you going to turn it to the left and towards The Tower?  Or are you going to turn it to the right and towards The Sun?

And The Sun is The Golden Light that is here to nourish us all.  The Sun is directly responsible for our bodies.  It grows food enough to feed the whole planet, directly or indirectly.  It can be said that without the Sun, there could be no Earth, and thus everything that we desire is under the Sun. 


Looking again at the reading with a fast glance, you see The Devil in the middle of it all.  Yes, this Earthly realm is front and center.  Your and my life here on Earth is our utmost focus right now, as it should be!  In some ways, this moment is not unlike any other, yet it is wholly unique as well.


We know not what lies directly in front of us, yet the guidance is clear.  The power is in your hands.  Your Chariot awaits and your hand is on The Wheel of Fortune.  Take it all in, but know you are being called to act!  Your guiding light is shining the way out of darkness and into the sunlight where we can all bask in it.  There is enough for everyone!


Thank you spirit for your continuing and loving support - now as always!

Mercury Retrograde and the Nines

Yesterday was the debut of the Fall series of free talks at the Herb Bar here in Austin, TX.  It also happened to be the slot I was given to talk about A Fool’s Journey.

For a few days now, I have been wanting to write about Mercury Retrograde, partly because I’ve been feeling it more strongly this time around and partly because I now understand it better as a result.

Often times, before I actually write a blog entry, I carry the information around for a few days waiting for the words to “fully congeal”, as it were.  Well, funny I find myself writing that last sentence because that process in and of itself is exactly what this blog entry is all about.

So I have been carrying around thoughts of the gift of Mercury Retrograde just waiting for further insight when, in the middle of my talk, I find it.

As I am discussing the Journey behind the Journey, I start explaining (my take on) the numerology of the Tarot.  In a nutshell, we start off with linear growth, then discontinuity, correction, then reevaluation.  After that, we hit the quantum leap.  Now you would think the cycle would end there, but it doesn’t.  The quantum leap is the eight.  Nine is about completion.  Even at ten, we are inside of the gateway, but not all the way through.

So after this huge leap forward in understanding or situation, we have two more steps to take before starting the next level.  It is at this time that we are likely to be the most impatient.  “I just got it, so now let’s go.  I’m ready! Come on!”

But, are the ‘i’s dotted or the ‘t’s crossed?

Recently, on a weekly basis, I have been working with a very powerful metaphysical woman named Stephanie Golden-Falcon.  My work with her has been accelerating my climb up a steep part of my journey.  Each week, we climb a rung on the ladder.  Yet this phase has been quite challenging because each week, something that has been holding me back is revealed. 

I described it to a friend like this:

“I feel like I have these things that are stuck to me.  Attached to them are bungee cords that connect down to lower rungs on the ladder.  Every time I take a step up, the tension of the cords pulls more.  If I don’t let them go, they are going to rip a piece of me off!”

Back to my talk, I get to the nine in my discussion and I start talking about completion and how the nine is here to make sure we did all that we needed to before moving on to the next level.  If we don’t get it done at the nine, then this pulling will get stronger in the next cycle and can even pull us all the way back.  In fact, how many of you out there feel like this lifetime has been all about tying up loose ends of uncompleted business from past lives?

So, in the midst of talking about completion, I find myself saying, “Mercury Retrograde is all about the nine”.  Wow!  I heard myself say that and then I really got it!

Mercury Retrograde slows us down, makes us go back and recheck, re-measure, reread and reedit.

In my software endeavor the other day, I was working with a colleague on new functionality when I made a small error.  I misspelled the name of a new column, which I caught a moment later.  However, I had run the software in between, which messed up my database.  The only way to fix this was to start over with a new database. Typically this is not a big deal, however this time, the software wouldn’t run after that.  We spent more than 30 minutes trying to figure out what was wrong before finding the problem.

Well, the bigger problem had nothing to do with my error, but my error forced me down a path that revealed the issue that was hiding.  We lost a few hours through the whole process, but ended up finding and fixing something we would have discovered eventually, but possibly at an even greater cost.  So ultimately, Mercury’s backward motion guided us toward better quality!  It wasn’t fun at the time, frustrating actually, but in the end, it “did good”.

And this is merely one example I’ve seen or experienced just in the past week!  I’m sure many of you found yourself going back to fix or finish something you thought was done already.

Back in the day when software was my main gig, we use to say, “It takes 90% of the time to complete the last 10%.”  It looks done when you hit that 90%, but then it takes forever to iron out all of the bugs. 

The Nine.  It feels like torture being so close yet so far.

As I go through my own process, I am reminded of the many nines that I left too soon.  In my haste, I rushed over some ‘i’s and ‘t’s.  In my impatience, I sprinted forward at the first chance that I got.  Through my strength, I pushed passed “go” and didn’t pay my full $200.

And now I am.

It’s funny because just the other day I said, “Mercury Retrograde never affects me.”  Now I get it.  I just wasn’t listening to him.  Somehow, the winged master let me off easy, until now.

But that’s okay because, through the Perfection of the Universe, it was what it was and was perfect.  By climbing the way I did, I now get to go back and review, and this time, I am taking notes.  “Ah, so that’s what I missed!” “I didn’t really understand that then, but now I get it!”

And the even better part is that I now get to help y’all, or at least anyone who asks.  And that’s putting on the finishing touches of one of my desired manifestations!

You have just a couple of days left of Mercury Retrograde, so partake of his gifts and then get ready for forward motion this October!  I have a feeling it will be faster than ever.  While he’s been resting, he’s been preparing his wings for a sprint to the 11:11:11 and then the 2010.

Best wishes on your Journey!

The Raccoon, the Armadillo, and the Possum.

When you live in Austin, TX, it is not rare to see any of the above critters sniffing around your back yard at night. In fact, fall asleep on the sofa with the back door open, and you’ll likely see or hear one in your kitchen helping themselves to your cats’ food. It was not even one week ago when I woke to the sound of hissing only to find my two cats standing next to each other seemingly united (a rare event). Further investigation revealed two empty food bowls and excessive dirt in the water bowl.

My guess was that an opportunistic, masked bandit paid a visit, then warned the local four-legged inhabitants to keep their distance. And have you ever heard a Raccoon hiss? If Dr. Jekyll were a cat, Mr. Hyde would most certainly be a Raccoon. My cats knew better than to engage him.

The Raccoon is known for his markings, his resourcefulness, and the ever-common warning to not corner one if you run into him. However, among themselves, Raccoons are generous with their earnings. The human observer typically only sees the mess left behind, but what they miss is the interesting kinship played within the clan.

A few mornings later, I woke in the dark before 6:00 am and opened the front door to let in the cool, morning breezes (something we’ve only just been able to do again here in TX). Notte, my cat, was sitting next to me on the sofa when we both heard a rustling just on the other side of the screen door. He perked up and then we both moved in for a better look.

Lo and behold, an Armadillo sniffed passed the door and was investigating the dirt out front. He didn’t even flinch when I turned on the light. If you’ve ever seen an Armadillo up close, then you know they are one strange looking animal. If they are not from a different place, they must certainly be left over from a different time.

A third night critter that has wandered through an opened door here on Trailside is the Possum. We haven’t been visited recently, but I’m sure they’ve been checking each of the two back doors now and again. In fact, once, one of this critters came in through the bedroom door and wandered all the way around to the kitchen to help himself to the cat food. I was sure they wouldn’t figure out that path and braved leaving the door open for my cats, but alas, I was proven wrong.

Now many find the sight of a possum frightening or disturbing. Their teeth are jagged and their tails cause them to look like giant rats, but they are really quite sweet. When I’ve woken to the sound of their crunching and then found them in my kitchen, they bump into the wall repeatedly as they search for the opening from which they entered. Light or not, these critters can’t see a thing. I’ve even seen one walk right into my cat as he made his way along the stone wall out back. Cali, my other cat, moved out of its way with surprise, but no defense.

Now, surely, by this point, you are wondering why David is talking about his occasional nocturnal visitors, as this is not his typical Blog post. But I do have a reason. You see, these animals are not just critters that scurry about in the night; they are also Totems and each symbolizes some form of action.

For example, Raccoon is known as the “Generous Protector”. This medicine is about protecting and assisting those in need. When Raccoon shows up, you are being called into service to help those less fortunate.

So why might Raccoon be showing up right now? Well, have you paid attention to what’s going on with your friends and neighbors lately? Have you been on Facebook?

More and more, people seem to be struggling with some challenge or other and calling out to their friends for help. Some days, it seems just as soon as you hang up the phone, another friend is calling for support. The Astrologers have been warning us of this time, and now they are saying it is upon us. In fact, today is supposed to be a doozy. 3:15 Central Time - so far so good.

So, let’s say you are one of the more fortunate ones in your circle, the one being called on rather than the one doing the calling. Well, Raccoon may be showing up symbolizing your ability to assist, but what if Armadillo shows up?

The Armadillo, with its funny looking armor, is all about “boundaries”. Helping others is great, but if you’re giving an inch only to lose the whole yard, then what? That’s when it is time to draw the line. One person can only do so much for another. There is nothing wrong with recognizing your own limits. When you’ve helped someone out of a tricky situation only to find yourself completely exhausted afterwards, in pain, in debt or with torn clothes, then maybe you’ve gone too far.

The struggles of late are not short-term challenges. Think endurance. On planes, they say, “Put your mask on first, then assist those around you.” If you run out of air, what good will that do anyone? It is great to help others, but it is also okay to say, “Look, I am tapped out right now.”

If you are clear about your boundaries within and of yourself, then you won’t likely have to set them with others. Before you venture to help another, think about how much you are up for. In the moment, allow yourself to adjust this, but be clear that it is your choice. Maybe the lesson for you is about obligation, guilt or responsibility. When you’re a martyr you give big once, but then you’re dead.

And then along comes Possum. Possum is best known for its ability to play dead. Apparently, they can even fake the smell of death to keep from being eaten by other animals. As a Totem, Possum is about diversion or distraction. Possum uses strategy to get out of a precarious situation.

You see, the thing in common with these three Totems is they all are nocturnal, showing up when it’s dark. Everything is tougher in the dark. Even if you are carrying around extra light, some out there are not and need some.

So what does it mean when Possum shows up? Well, let me explain it like this:

Have you ever been driving at night to find a deer standing in the middle of the road? They look up at you fully aware that you are approaching, yet are frozen. “Like a deer caught in headlights” is a well-known phrase.

So, let’s say your friend is struggling with something and is so entranced by the challenge that they see nothing else. They are the deer caught in headlights and will get hit if they don’t move. So what do you do?

Distract them. Divert their attention. Get them to look away just long enough to come back to their senses and think clearly again. This is not always easy. It’s no wonder they say the “art of distraction”. There is a fine line between a healthy distraction, and negligence. You don’t want someone to be so distracted that they become irresponsible of themselves, but you also don’t want them to be so focused on the challenge that they can’t see a solution.

I’m sure many of you have heard Abraham talk about turning your attention away from what you don’t want. Well, sometimes, we are being called upon to help others do just that. It is not avoidance, but allowance. Accept what is, then turn toward what is desired. The challenges may be upon us, but they are not without solutions. Look for solutions to find solutions.

The Equinox is only five days away, and after that we will enter the half of the year when there is more darkness than light. Plenty out there will need you Raccoons and Possums to help them out, but don’t lose sight of your own limits. We’ve been working on our gifts for a long time; it is only natural that they will be called upon.

Take it one day at a time and enjoy the gift of giving whenever you can... otherwise you might find yourself curling up into a tight ball for protection, just like Armadillo...

Illumination - The Eleven

Many people today are finding themselves thinking about the event of eight years ago and yet what I am most reminded of today is something that happened more then eight years ago, eight years and three days ago in fact.

On 09-08-2001, I was traveling by train from Washington, DC to New York City. I had never taken a train into NY from the south before and at one point noticed that the only buildings I could see were the World Trade Center towers. I grew up about 60 miles from New Your City in a suburb called Danbury just over the state line into Connecticut. All of our local TV was NYC stations and so the towers were a constant icon of my youth. As I sat on that train, I looked out at the towers with awe and nostalgia.

A short time after that I arrived at Penn station, boarded a subway train, and then later ascended to street level. I walked out of the subway and headed north dragging my roller-board behind me. Suddenly, an energy caught hold of me. It was as if some person placed a hand on each shoulder and tugged. So I turned toward the south and uttered, out loud, “What?”

What I saw in the distance were two nearly glowing towers staring back at me. I knew it was the World Trade Center that sought my attention and I knew they were talking to me. Yes, buildings have consciousness. Cities too. Everything does. It is the consciousness of things that keeps the atoms together. And we feel them all of the time. When you say, “I love NY,” and really feel it, that’s who you love!

So I looked at the companions of my youth and asked them, again out loud, after all, who in NY is going to think I’m weird, “What are you trying to tell me?” And then I listened. I felt their energy, but could not hear their words. My query went unanswered that day.

Yet, suffice it to say, three days later, I knew. I could make out the words even. I was able to translate the telepathic communication. “Take a good look at us, my friend, because you will never see us in person again.” Intuitively I did as I was told, yet unknowingly.

Now, despite my relationship with Wall Street (via my work) and New York (via my childhood and family), I, to this day, do not believe I knew a single person that died on 09-11-2001. And yet, on that day, and many times since, I have cried and cried at the very real loss of the two dear friends I did lose. My childhood ended on that day, as did the childhood of a tremendous number of people, of any age.

It is now eight years later and my life is completely different than it was then. In fact, it has changed multiple times. There is at least one more major change in the works and I’m sure many little ones that will build up to it, but before I go there, I want to talk about numbers.

In the digital age, numbers catch our attention, readily. Even as I write this line, I find myself glancing at the digital time display on my computer as it says 9:33 am.

So, what do these numbers mean?

Well, I am not a numerologist per se, but in writing A Fool’s Journey, I learned a great deal about numerology, at least as related to the Tarot. So lets look at a few numbers.

09-11-2001 is a 9.11.3, which totals 5. (9+1+1+2+0+0+1 = 14, 1+4 = 5)

In the Tarot, fives are filled with challenge and strife. The 5 of Cups is about sorrow, the 5 of Swords fear, the 5 of Pentacles financial hardship and infirmity. Even the 5 of Wands, the most optimistic of the fives, is still about challenge, albeit challenge that is explicitly chosen.

09-11-2001 was most certainly a five, in fact it was all of the fives of the Tarot at the same time. At the highest level of consciousness and truth, it was even a 5 of wands. Yet five was just the sum total number. The pieces were 9, 11, and 3. Nine is about completion, eleven is illumination, and three creation.

Now you might have noticed that I didn’t reduce 11 to 2. That is because 11 is a master number (a double digit). Master numbers can be thought to represent a higher evolution of the number they reduce to. Two means direction, the connection or path between two points. At eleven, the lights along the road get turned on and that which was hidden or hard to see becomes clear and apparent.

To me, 09-11-2001 was the physical manifestation of what was already in existence. It was an event that showed the whole world what was really happening, but previously out of common view. Through a completion or ending (9), the path ahead was illuminated (11) which in and of itself presented an opportunity to create (3) something different. I don’t think anyone will deny that life is very different post 09-11-2001 than it was before.

So now, let’s bring our attention back to the present or at least the very recent past. This week, we passed through 09-09-09. Now many refer to this as the 9.9.9, but to me, this isn’t exactly true. 2009 is an 11, not a 9. Nonetheless, 09-09-09 catches our attention and for this reason, it is significant.

And today is 09-11-09, which is a 9.11.11 totaling 4. As a four, we are stable, even if just for a moment. There are still endings to be had (9), and plenty to be illuminated (11.11), but for the moment, nothing will likely happen (4). No apparent movement forward. Four represents a resting place in between the linear growth of the 1..2..3 and the difficult shift of the 5.

Now, a date I am personally looking forward to is 11-11-2009, which is 11.11.11 and thus 6. Will something happen on that day to finally shed light on some of what we still don’t know? If it does, it should represent solution and progress (6). Who knows? I’ll be on the look out then and in the mean time.

And, you might find this interesting. Have you ever had a time period in your life when you seemed to catch 11:11 on the clock all of the time? For me, this comes and goes. Sometimes it is 11:11; sometimes I just seem to glance at the clock when it is 11, 22, 33, 44 or 55 minutes after the hour. When doing readings, this happens all of the time. However, for a good couple of weeks, I’ve been seeing 11:10 on the clock. “Funny,” I think to myself, “I keep missing 11:11 by one minute.”

You might laugh, but it was only a couple of minutes ago that I figured this out. I realized that my seeing 11:10 is probably because the 11.11.11 is coming and I feel it. It is the “eleventh hour” of the 11.11.11, you might say.

Many of you may have heard me talk about the Perfection of the Universe. Someday, you will see a book by that title with my name on it, I’m sure. Perfection is always present. What is right now, is the sum total of what has been. In that way, every five is chosen, is created and is perfect. Painful? Yes. Destined? No.

A client of mine once said, “Life right now is really hard, but as you say, it is what it is supposed to be.” But that is not what I am saying. 09-11-2001 was not what it was supposed to be, yet it was perfect. The sum total of humanity created 09-11-2001 and it was painful, but someday we’ll see what it brought that was beautiful. If you look, you can see plenty already. The love that poured out of everyone’s hearts the days and weeks that followed is an example.

As you remember whatever you remember today, I offer this: look for the phoenix. Look for that which rose from the ashes and soars higher today than before. Don’t deny what you feel. If there is pain left, there is pain. If there is sorrow, fear, or anger, acknowledge that, but look for the phoenix, because she is what will bring you the light, the illumination. This entire year is an 11, and it is not over yet.

“Do not fear or condemn the misuse of power; neither fear nor condemnation will save you from it.”

P. 312: XX – Judgment - A Fool’s Journey

I am so close, I can taste it!

As a reader of the Tarot, I often notice that for a while, a particular card will appear in reading after reading. What does this mean?

Well, it could mean that I am in the process of manifesting that situation, but it hasn’t arrived yet. It could be a habitual or perpetual emotional or mental state I am finding myself in these days. It could be that I need to learn something and I haven’t quite gotten it yet. Or, it could be an indication of the ‘psychic weather’ and thus be a dominant vibration for all to learn from.

Of course, it could be all of these things.

In any event, when I notice a card coming up frequently in a short period of time, I pay attention. I listen for more information and typically find myself understanding the card along with some aspect of my life more clearly than before.

So, what’s in the psychic weather these days?

The 5 of Pentacles.

In the traditional Rider-Waite version of this card, we see two impoverished souls standing out in the cold: homeless, hopeless, handicapped. This is the card of financial hardship, loss, infirmity.

But what if this card shows up and you are healthy and financially stable? What does it mean then?

A number of months ago I asked this question of a spiritual teacher of mine and she said,

"The five of pentacles can also be an indication of that feeling like when you're on the outside looking in."

Ah, this really resonated with me. So I sat this with this for a few months and let the new information hover in the back of my mind.

Then, last week, I was doing a reading for a woman and the 5 of pentacles showed up in her reading. I found myself describing it this way,

"It is like standing in front of a store window looking at everything you want just out of reach on the other side of the glass. You are saying to yourself, 'Everything I want is right here, but I can't have it.'"

We've all been there. It is when "it’s so close you can taste it". But what is that taste? Bittersweet? Or just plain sour? When what we want is something we've lived a lifetime without, it can be quite painful to witness it right in front of us but still out of reach. I have found myself thinking, "Why are you punishing me by showing me what I can't have and parading it right in front of my face?"

I have asked for this experience, but I want to have it myself, not just sit back and watch another having it. Yet I am entranced and cannot turn away from it.

This situation is what Abraham means when they talk about traveling from Phoenix to San Diego and turning around when in Yuma, the halfway point. When things start showing up this way, you are halfway! You are in Yuma en route to beautiful San Diego; you're just not there yet!

So, in that reading, after describing to the Querent how to think about that card, I heard guidance from spirit. Clear as a bell they said,

"Stop the mantra half way through. Keep saying to yourself, 'Everything I want is right here,' then stop."

That's it! That's the answer. Everything I want is right here! Yes, I don't yet have it, but so what! If I can create it, live and in person, right before my eyes, then I can create it for myself! The fact that I am witnessing this event and seeing another person having the experience I desire means that I am on the verge of manifesting it for myself. If my vibration were not close, I wouldn’t even see it!

So I am in Yuma and yeah, if you've been in Yuma, it is not exactly the prettiest place, but it is a lot closer to San Diego than Phoenix. No, the Pacific breezes are not yet apparent. No, I haven't yet traveled through the beautiful, rocky hills of Imperial County. But I am en route and if I maintain 65 miles per hour, I can make it there in 2 1/2 hours!

So, next time you see what you REALLY want and it is just out of reach, keep saying, 'What I want is right here,' then stop.

“Everything I want is right here!”

“Everything I want is right here!”

“Everything I want is so close I can taste it!”

“It’s only a matter of time...”

Actually, it is only a matter of vibration really. Feel the joy of the experience even though you are not the one having it just yet. Feel how good it will feel and that will push you right into the experience yourself, and in no time!

Fives are not meant to be experienced for a long time. They are meant to pull us out of a rut and place us on a new path – that’s all. Think of it like airport security, once you get past it, your new journey is ready to begin! And oh what places we will see!

Summer Session

Walking on a Dream by Empire of the Sun

Walking on a dream
How can I explain?
Talking to myself
Will I see again?

We are always running
For the thrill of it, thrill of it
Always pushing up the hill
Searching for the thrill of it

On and on and on
We are calling out and out again
Never looking down
I’m just in awe of what’s in front of me

Is it real now?
When two people become one
I can feel it
When two people become one

Thought I’d never see
The love you found in me
Now it’s changing all the time
Living in a rhythm
Where the minute’s working overtime

We are always running
For the thrill of it, thrill of it
Always pushing up the hill
Searching for the thrill of it

On and on and on
We are calling out and out again
Never looking down
I’m just in awe of what’s in front of me

Is it real now?
When two people become one
I can feel it
When two people become one

Is it real now?
When two people become one
I can feel it
When two people become one

Catch me, I’m falling down
Catch me, I’m falling down

Don’t stop, just keep going on
I’m your shoulder, lean upon
So come on, deliver from inside
All we got is tonight
That is right ‘til first light

Is it real now?
When two people become one
I can feel it
When two people become one

Is it real now?
When two people become one


Summer Session is just about over. Have you passed? Are you ready for fall courses?

Summer session was all about self-study. Spirit put us in a room and locked the door. In the corner of the room were two boxes. One held some of our greatest fears and the other a big ole manual.

Self-study can be the hardest kind. We are alone. Try as we might, no one comes to our beckon call. Some of us are sitting in that one chair, head down on the table banging our fists, “Why does it have to be this way? Why is it so hard? Haven’t I suffered enough?”

Meanwhile, the manual sits next to us on the table, unopened or unread.

Not all of us have been in self-study, but many of us have. Why? Because we signed up for fall courses (yet to come) and the self-study was a pre-requisite. “Fall courses? What’s this about fall courses?”

Well, are you sitting down? Don’t worry, it’s not that bad; no worse than the fall of 2008... maybe...

Don’t worry; some of you are going to meet your dreams and desires face-to-face this fall. Are you prepared? Maybe you should crack open that manual while it is still summer?

In case you’re still curious, self-study is all about meeting those parts of us we’ve hidden away for a while. Do you remember, for example, that part of you that makes you feel dump and vulnerable – like when you saw that boy or girl you really liked in 6th grade. Was it embarrassing when they laughed at you? Of course it was! It is not easy being naked in front of all of those peers, especially when you’re the only one.

So, why do we need this self-study for the next course? Well, for me, my dream can only be realized when all of me is present; “When two people become one” How can I be intimate with you if I am hiding a part of me in an iron safe?

I would wager that each one of us in self-study has a unique curriculum, a one-of-a-kind manual and a chair and table just a little different than everyone else. Some of the challenges may look the same, but what they are revealing?

So, what’s next is the fall. Fall, when traditional school starts up again; when we get reacquainted with our pals and when we are all in the same classroom again. “So, Johnny, what did you learn over the summer?” the teacher asks? “Oh, that’s very good Johnny; we are going to need someone around here who knows how to do that! This is a very important fall, Johnny. I’m glad you are here with us.”

This is just a hunch, but it feels like we are going to be working together a lot more this fall than we have been. That problem we needed to solve for ourselves? Well, I’m sure we’ll help a dozen others with something similar.

“Excuse me, teacher? My summer was not very fun. I spent a lot of time alone, scared and I cried a bunch too. I don’t see how that is any help to anyone”

“Well, Suzy, someone this fall is going to lose something that was very dear to them and they are not going to understand it. Do you think you can be with them when they cry? Would you be able to cry with them? Can you be a shoulder to cry on?”

“I’m still crying every day, so that’ll be easy!”

“Good. Then you’ll be the one picked to help the other when the time comes.”

I started this blog entry with the lyrics to a song that really touched me this weekend, Walking on a Dream by Empire of the Sun. I feel like a bookmark is being laid on the time line of my life. “Pay attention to this moment because this is the weekend when you walked through a doorway into the rest of your life”

There is something in the lyrics of that song that feel so profound. I’m gonna keep listening...

“Don’t stop, just keep going on
I’m your shoulder, lean upon

So come on, deliver from inside
All we got is tonight
That is right ‘til first light

Is it real now?
When two people become one
I can feel it
When two people become one...”